Wednesday, March 30, 2011

I spy with my little eyes...

Life is funny in the way that it doesn't give two shits about our "plans". As a matter of fact, it seems as if life takes great pleasure in completely tearing asunder any plans that we make to maintain it. Maintain...helluva word. Not one I'm particularly attached to seeing as how it implies control and limitation. I'm beginning, for the first time in a long time, to see that living a maintained, planned life, is just a futile attempt to create structure in a world that is built around and FOR chaos. I think many of us have adopted this mentality that the world is "manageable". How could we ever be so daft? Shakespeare said it best, all the world is a stage and we are merely actors...who don't have access to the rewrites that our great playwright decides.

I'm tossing aside (or at least, TRYING) the human tendency to compartmentalize my life. I am working on not labeling each of you, and placing you neatly into your assigned space. You stand so much taller when you are simply yourself, a solo entity, and not lumped in with a group, genre, color coded and neatly pressed.
I'm finding that I can enjoy myself more when I'm not always trying to decide if each choice I make will echo throughout my entire life. I'm living for right now, for the moments of happiness that I can find, for the people that I can hold and whisper my story to at this moment, the only one I'm certain of. I am not CARELESS, but I am more conscious of how important taking each opportunity for happiness is.

I hope for a future, but I don't feel that it is inevitable like I once did, that the universe OWED me that opportunity. I take each day, as corny as it may seem, as a gift. I am thankful for this life I have, and for my mind opening just enough to really appreciate the beauty, love, experience, joy, and contentment that even a simple Wednesday can offer.

Now playing: Alison Krauss - It Doesn't Matter
via FoxyTunes

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